My cooking has changed and I'm not sure why. I feel like I'm off my game and have been feeling this way for quite a while. I used to be more of an improvisational cook with the ability to whip up something nourishing, flavorful, budget friendly and unexpected at a moments notice but now I stare at my cupboards and fridge with utter confusion (Don't tell the man who gifted me the 203 pounds of pig). I have moments of panic when someone asks me questions about flavor combinations or cooking technique, I always seem to be searching for the "right" answer. Sometimes I think it's pressure, the pressure to create original, thoughtful recipes using local, organic, or whole ingredients. Bonus points for anything vegan, "ethnic" or gluten free. Other times I think I'm just overwhelmed by the many choices around me through blogs, magazines, and cookbooks. Normally those things inspire me but not so much at the moment. Shockingly this hasn't affected most of my work. I just finished up a print article with three mildly original recipes that I pulled out of my hat with some ease. Recipe testing and development assignments are easy because I'm basically given everything I need to work with. But recently someone asked me to put together a small dinner menu for their cafe, and everything I've written seems uninspired or like something that's already been done and this is a time when I need to impress. Sure I could call on a friend for help but I want the ideas to come from my head not anyone else's.
So what do I wish I could change? I want to go back to being that improvisational cook without all of the voices, fear, and outside influences in my head. The one who was once confident in her own choices. I know she's still there I just need to find her, and fast!
I'm curious, what are some of your cooking demons? How has your style and technique changed? What do you wish you could get back to?
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